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Headlines from the year 2029

Chick on Thu February 24, 2005 4:01 PM User is offlineView users profile

Being in the AC business, you gotta love the first one....



Headlines from the year 2029

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia formerly known as California. White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.



Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.



Baby conceived naturally . scientists stumped.



Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.



Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).



Iraq still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.



France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.



Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.



George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.



Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.



85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.



Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.



Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut. (hey! I just sent it. I didn't write it!)



Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.



Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.



Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.



New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.



Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.



Capitol Hill intern indicted for refusing to have sex with congressman.



IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.



Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.




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Chick
Email: Chick

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Freedoms just another word for nothing left to lose

TRB on Thu February 24, 2005 9:21 PM User is offlineView users profile

I don't see any news about the penguins behaving better. Better get to work my friend its all in your hands!

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NickD on Thu February 24, 2005 10:37 PM User is offline

LOL, nothing about the Antarctic becoming a tropical paradise? If you believe in predictions, Mexifornia will be part of the Pacific Ocean floor well before then.

Tony on Mon March 07, 2005 1:01 AM User is offlineView users profile

Hey Chick,
I'm gonna borrow that.

That is funny!!

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BAT Auto Technical

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